At least he was trying to help

Dispatcher to reporter, during afternoon cop checks: Not much going on today. Our big news was that we had a runaway goat this afternoon. He was out directing traffic. And backing it up.

That Palomino's got a killer right hook

Dispatch: Respond to a complaint at ADDRESS. Complainant says there's a man here fighting with a horse.

What a considerate lady

Officer, about a case he's working: She says the suspect left her bag of meth there to reassure her she'd come back.

The driver was probably upset about failing the test

Traffic complaint at the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles.) Complainant reports that they were almost hit by a truck in the parking lot of the DMV. The driver has left the scene.

Little Brown Jug

Drunk complaint at 29th and Montana. Caller reports that there are about 10 people outside passing a jug around and wearing ratty clothing.

Thanks, Captain Obvious!

Officer investigating a drug complaint: "Well, it smells like marijuana here because it's a marijuana store."

No, that's just what happens when you eat there...

Dispatch: Caller is at the downtown Denny's, inside the building. He says he thinks a snake bit him there and that his body is tingling all over.

You say potato ...

Dispatch: Caller is reporting the theft of an ... ogre ... ?

Cop: "That would be auger."

Dispatch: "That is correct."

Well, he may be French...

Officer, after a huge rain/hail storm hit the area: It's raining so hard out here that I saw a frog on the side of the road and he was holding up a white flag.

Nude driving

DISPATCH: Attempt to locate in the vicinity of the Speedy Wash. Vehicle is described as a black BMW. Suspect is a 30s white male with no shirt and his pants around his ankles the last time the complainant saw him.

One more try...

Testing yet again...

Why is this so hard?

For some reason, new blog posts still aren't being uploaded to Facebook. So we've adjusted some more settings and posting another test post in 3, 2, 1,

What's the number again?

Dispatch: We've got a caller who just dialed 911 to ask what 911 is.

Some don't like the roundabouts here, but really?

Dispatch: Caller reports there's a female standing in the middle of the road, throwing road construction signs into the middle of the roadway.

Officer: I've got her. She's in the parking lot of the Reno, throwing traffic signs and cones into the road.

Dispatch: Don't get hit.

Bored or frustrated?

Officer #1: We're meeting on Main Street. I thought we already agreed to that.
Officer #2: siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiggghhhh

But did you beat the high score at the arcade pinball?

Caller at Rimrock Mall has lost track of his 86-year-old uncle. The uncle may be headed down 24th St. West.

We're on Facebook

We've created a Facebook page, but there's a glitch somewhere in the system, so these blog posts aren't getting posted to Facebook very quickly.

So, we've made a change or two. Let's consider this a test post...

If you know you're crazy, doesn't that make you more sane?

Dispatch: A 47-year-old woman is calling in complaining that she is insane. She is awake and breathing.

Dog update

Officer describing the dog (with barking in the background):

"It's a pretty big one. It's brown with a white face and a little red pepper spray on its face."

Throw it a bone

Dispatch: Animal complaint. The complainant states that the neighbor’s pit bull is pacing at the end of their driveway and they can’t get out to their mailbox. The pit bull is known to be aggressive.

The stress of parenthood, perhaps?

Passerby reports that there is a female in her 30's next to a parked minivan with her head resting on the sidewalk. The caller reports that there are crying children inside the minivan, but is unsure of what the problem is.

If it was in a tree, it would've been the fire department.

Officer: I'm on scene. The complainant says that he's got some kind of rabid animal underneath his car.

...a few minutes later...

Officer: Well, he's got a cat stuck in the car's wheel well. Somebody else here says they've called in about this and they're on hold with you right now.

Dispatch: Hold on, let me check. Yeah, I see the call here.

Officer: So do we have anybody who can respond who has...uh...this kind of expertise?

Dispatcher #2: Why don't you start with "Here kitty, kitty, kitty."

Officer: Affirmative.

Dispatcher #3: Or if you call him Rex, he might just come out.

Officer: Affirmative. (sighs) Just tell whoever's coming out here to bring some gloves, too. (calls out for any available animal control units)

I feel pretty...

Dispatch: Suspect is described as white male with blond hair and wearing a denim dress.

Isn't that kind of their job?

Officer, after responding to a drunk call: Can you call the cab company, or whatever it is, and ask them why they don't take drunk people home?

Dispatch, a few minutes later: I called the cab company. They said it's up to the driver's discretion whether or not to give somebody a ride home and whether they feel safe doing it. They said it's their right to choose to refuse service.

Officer: Wow. Alright, I'll remember that on Friday and Saturday nights and tell people to call someone else from now on.

Maybe it's an actual pirate?

Dispatch: Caller reports a strange man in the parking lot. He's trying to sell jewelry and harassing people. Caller also reports he has a large knife in his pants. Described the suspect as wearing a "weird looking" red jacket, like a pirate jacket.

Gotta support your kids

Dispatch: Respond to a possible vandalism at XXXXX. The business owner said a male juvenile walked by and threw a rock through the window. The complainant said the child's mother then started yelling at him when he went outside to confront them.

Must be a Californian

Cop to dispatch: "I'll be out here at 29th and Montana at an accident with one of the worst drivers I've ever seen. I'll advise on injuries."

aaaannd...

Cop to dispatch: "I'll be out here on State [Avenue] arguing with a guy on a go-kart."

Haulin'

Cop: If you get a report of a man pushing a wheelbarrow on Sugar Ave., he's headed over to the trailer court. I've checked on him - he's fine.